Seduction
by KrysSaiyan
Summary: SportaRobbie. It was simple. Make the stupid blue elf fall in love, and then tell him to leave LazyTown forever. Milford did everything Bessie asked, right? The plan was sound, the methods sure. But Robbie didn't remember that love works both ways.
1. Sweet Talk

**Chapter 1: Sweet Talk**

"MILFORD!"

Stephanie and her friends looked up from their game, hearing the responding yelp from the mayor and his rushed reply, "Coming Ms Busybody, coming right away!"

"I don't know why he does so much for her," Trixie commented, holding the basketball still. Stephanie shrugged.

"He likes her a lot," she explained. "I think adults do anything for the other person when they're in love."

"That sounds like a gross girly book," Stingy made a face.

"Maybe," the pink haired girl said. "But that's how it is. My uncle would do _anything_ for Ms Busybody!"

"Just because he loves her? That's so weird!" Trixie added.

Meanwhile, a certain villain tore himself away from his periscope. He started pacing.

"People do anything for the person they love?…" he muttered to himself, thinking. He tapped the side of his head. "Anything… anything…" A light bulb went off.

"I'M A GENIUS!" he laughed, throwing hands up in the air in self-celebration. He stalked over to a bookshelf, grabbing a heavily dusted tome and blowing said dust off of it. He coughed, settling in his orange chair, and opened it to read the title, smiling wickedly.

"How To Get The Good Guy To Fall In Love With You…. For Dummies."

He flipped to the first page, and settled in for the read.

* * *

Sportacus gave the kids an armful of sports candy, smiling brightly at them as they munched away at it.

"Thanks Sportacus!" Ziggy said, biting into a banana.

"No problem!" he responded. The kids chattered happily amongst themselves, and he noticed a certain someone sulking around behind a wall. He tilted his head curiously and flipped over, leaping nimbly onto the wall and perching there.

"Robbie?"

Robbie yelped and flailed briefly, as if expecting a blow. After a moment he peeked out and saw the sports elf looking down at him curiously, and flashed a nervous smile.

"Hello Sportad… Sportacus."

Sportacus blinked, thrown off a little by Robbie calling him by name. He let it roll off.

"What are you doing over here?" he asked innocently. Robbie fidgeted, glancing away.

"Oh, nothing," the man said evasively. "Just… out on a walk… thought I'd get some fresh air…" Sportacus beamed at him.

"That's great! Fresh air is good for you!"

Robbie did his very best to not grimace at that fact. The sacrifices he was making…

"Y-yeah," he managed. "Thought I'd try something new today…"

Sportacus was still beaming at him, and flipped off the wall to land in front of him.

"Well, if you want to, me and the kids are having a snack break," he offered. "Would you like any sports candy?"

Robbie tried to remember what the book said.

"U-umm, uh…" he stuttered. Sportacus stayed there, smiling lightly, and waited. "M-maybe?" he finished, squeaking a little. Sportacus looked like he might jump out of his skin with glee.

"That's _great_!" he exclaimed. Robbie flinched involuntarily. Sportacus grabbed his hand and dragged him around the wall.

"Guys!" he said, getting the attention of the kids. "Robbie's gonna join us!"

"Now wait a-!"

"WOW!" the kids all said. They grinned encouragingly at him, except for Stephanie, who was regarding him skeptically. Robbie contemplated teleporting away. He felt the old social phobia crawling up his spine.

'Just hang on,' he told himself. 'This is all for the greater good… getting Sportacus out of town… you can do this…'

He gulped and awkwardly sat down on a bench next to Ziggy. Sportacus looked over the sports candy, assessing which ones might have enough of a sweet taste to impress Robbie. "Ah!" he said quietly, plucking a banana from the pile and handing it to Robbie.

"It tastes sweet," he explained. Robbie looked at him suspiciously, but took the banana. He looked down at it and tried to not feel sick.

'It'll get him out of my hair forever,' he told himself again, peeling it carefully and looking at the edible inside. He shuddered slightly and shakily brought it up to his lips… opened mouth… and took a small bite.

He shuddered violently and tried to repress a gag reflex as the group cheered. Not the right kind of sweet at all. He wanted his cake. He painstakingly took another bite, and the kids went back to devouring their own shares. The sports elf was still watching him though, head titled slightly and a small smile on his lips. When he noticed Robbie look up, his smile deepened.

Soon enough the group finished, and the kids started playing again. Still attempting to impress the sports elf, Robbie participated.

For about two minutes, before he became utterly exhausted and retreated. That was enough for the day, he reasoned, dragging his feet back in the direction of his house. He desperately needed a nap.

Five minutes later, Sportacus looked up from the game and noticed Robbie missing. He frowned slightly, wondering where the man went to.

"Sportacus!" one of the kids yelled, getting his attention again. He rejoined play, a smile automatically coming to his face.

He could find out later.

* * *

AN:

It's been awhile! Here is a fic I've been working on for a bit. If anyone doesn't understand Robbie's thought process, it goes thusly: make Sportacu fall in love with him. Tell Sportacus to leave. Then, Sportacus will leave town forever, because people do anything for the person they love! Yes, Robbie knows next to nothing about love, and yes, it's going to blow up in his face.

This fic is actually finished, but I'll be spacing out the chapters a bit as usual. The chapter title themes this time around are acts of seduction! Makes for sexy chapters. "Seduction" also means "foreplay". Sometimes. When I feel like it.

Leave reviews if you would please! I know this chapter is short, but there's only 6 of them. Bear with me guys!


	2. Drop A Line

**Chapter 2: Drop A Line**

Robbie slept through the rest of the day and into the night. He tossed and turned in his chair at about four in the morning, unable to rest any longer. His legs and arms were sore from the brief spot of activity the day before, and he just _couldn't_ sleep anymore. It was an atrocity.

He bemoaned his traitorous body, even as he climbed stiffly out of the chair, and kept going, even as he hoisted himself up out of the entrance to his home.

Nothing in this little town opened until later, but maybe he could catch a nap on a bench somewhere while the little brats were still asleep. He smiled a little to himself at the thought of it, and strutted off.

* * *

Sportacus woke up with the sun, stretching happily with hands over his head. After a quick breakfast, he went through his usual routine. He would have thought about Robbie and his sudden switch over, but all the activity left little room for thought.

It was a bright beautiful day! Not a cloud in the sky, the sun peeking over the horizon… Sportacus descended from his air ship home and went through his morning exercises on the ground, half hoping that Stephanie or some of the other kids would be awake and come out and join him.

He loved exercise and activity… but he liked playing with other people more. Being active was fun, but nowhere near as fun as being active with friends! Speaking of…

Sportacus spotted Robbie just as Robbie spotted him. Robbie startled backwards, nearly falling over a trashcan, and Sportacus zipped over, catching him in time.

"You're up early!" the sports elf chirped as he set Robbie on his feet.

"Not by choice," Robbie muttered sullenly, straightening out his clothes. He stopped. "Urk. I mean…"

"No one else is up either," Sportacus was bouncing lightly on his feet, genuinely pleased that at least _someone_ was out and about. "And you usually sleep in late." Robbie frowned slightly.

"All that… _activity_ yesterday made me fall asleep. Then I wake up at this ungodly hour and can't sleep anymore. It's horrible."

Sportacus laughed, and Robbie watched him carefully. The blue elf was freakishly healthy. _No one_ got up at sunrise and _liked_ it. But here he was, smiling happily like it was the middle of the day. Was he some kind of superhuman… thing? Robbie shook his head to clear it. He didn't need to get caught up in wondering how or why. He just needed to focus on getting the weirdo to love him. He thought quickly.

"So…" he started. "Come here often?" Sportacus stared for a moment.

"To the apple tree?"

Robbie looked up and saw, indeed, they were standing by the apple tree. Where Sportacus _always_ came by. Robbie cursed internally. He was too out of practice to be doing this.

"Er… I meant… say, I'm curious about something."

Sportacus smiled encouragingly and stretched.

"Go ahead and ask," he said.

"Well… you ever been kissed?"

Sportacus stopped. Which for Sportacus, was a big deal. Stopping, that is. He stared at Robbie for a few moments, his face blank, before he broke out in a smile again. It was beginning to grate on Robbie's nerves.

"That's a funny question," he commented, resuming his stretches and calisthenics.

"Are you going to answer it?"

Sportacus paused briefly but kept going.

"Hmm," he breathed, waving his arms in circles to get them warmed up. "No. I've never had a kiss. Unless you mean by my parents?"

Robbie gawked for a second. He seriously never?… even Robbie had kissed people before, though, granted, it was awkward end-of-date high school kissing. But still!

"N-no, parents and siblings and stuff don't count," he replied shakily. Damn. That response threw off his planned answer. Think of another. His mind went back to the book. Maybe…

"Are your legs tired?" he blurted out. Sportacus quirked an eyebrow at him, one hand halfway raised to pull himself onto a branch to do pull ups.

"No," he answered slowly. "Why?" He grabbed the branch with both hands and started pulling himself up.

"Because you've been running through my head all night."

Robbie grinned smugly. He remembered reading that. He wasn't sure where, but it had popped into his head. Ha. So there. Score one for him.

Sportacus hung there limply and stared at Robbie. Minutes passed, and the elated feeling Robbie had quickly faded into irritation. He fidgeted and glanced suspiciously at the sports elf.

"What?" he snapped. Sportacus dropped down from the tree limb and walked over. Robbie backed up into a wall, nervous. What was he up to? He flinched slightly and closed his eyes as Sportacus stood close and raised his hand up. A moment later, he opened his eyes again at the light touch on his forehead.

"Are you feeling okay?" Sportacus asked in a concerned voice. Robbie shuddered. The elf's hand felt warm. Weird.

"I-I'm fine," he answered. The sports freak needed to get out of his personal bubble, or else. Sportacus frowned in worry and pressed his palm against Robbie's forehead, then the back of his hand against the side of his face.

"You don't feel warm," he mused. Robbie fought the slight shiver that went through him. He was _not_ used to being touched, especially not in such a gentle manner.

"I said I'm fine," he said, pushing the elf's hand away. Sportacus regarded him solemnly for a moment before sighing.

"Alright," he conceded. "I have to finish my workout. Maybe we can play later?"

"Y-yeah," Robbie muttered, not really considering it fully. "Later."

Sportacus rushed off to finish his run around Lazy Town and Robbie sulked off to his lair.

That book had to have something. This was taking too long.

* * *

He flipped through it again and again, not seeing anything useful. He seethed.

"Stupidest thing ever," he growled to himself. "Embarrassing. Not that I haven't embarrassed myself every _other_ time I go to the surface," he rolled his eyes. "Nothing new. But _still_. That was… IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" He yelled at the book and threw it across the room, huffing and slouching in his chair with his arms crossed across his chest, in a sulk.

"There's got to be something to do," he muttered. "Trying to seduce someone is hard work. I _hate_ hard work! Why can't he just fall for my stunning good looks and we can be done with this?" He flopped across his chair dramatically, bemoaning his existence and all the _work_ he was needlessly doing.

That stupid blue elf was doing his job of keeping people active by just _existing_. It was disgusting.

He finally got fed up and stomped over to the book, snatching it up off the floor and opening it to a random page. He glanced down at it, contemplative. His face was slowly overcome with a grin, and he snapped the book shut.

"Perfect."

* * *

AN:

Poor Robbie tries to use pick up lines. XD Sportacus doesn't understand and has come to the conclusion that Robbie must not be feeling alright. He keeps saying weird things after all. And Robbie blames the book for feeding him such cheesy lines that obviously don't work.

I like the word "bemoaned".

Was this a fast enough update for you guys:3 I got 5 reviews in less than 24 hours. That's a new damn record. I feel spoiled.


	3. Sudden, Unexpected Kiss

**Chapter 3: Sudden, Unexpected Kiss**

Sportacus walked on his hands across the top of a wall to the applause of the kids. He did a tight flip off of it once he reached the end. Standing easily, he was beaming at the kids' enthusiasm to imitate him when his crystal lit up, beeping. He looked down at it.

"Someone's in trouble!" he exclaimed, and gave the kids an apologetic glance before dashing off to rescue.

It wasn't unusual for Robbie Rotten to find himself in trouble. It _was_ unusual, however, for him to be rather calm about the whole thing. Sportacus looked up from the ground at where Robbie was perched on the tree limb.

"How did you get up there?" he asked.

"Oh, um… looking for… my kitten?"

Sportacus' eyes widened.

"You have a kitten?" he said it quietly, almost breathlessly. Robbie looked uneasy at that glittering in the elf's blue eyes.

"Are you going to save me or what?" he complained. That seemed to shake Sportacus out of whatever daze he was in, and he quickly spotted a ladder laying nearby and grabbed it, easily turning it to lean against the tree trunk.

"Climb down Robbie!' he said. Robbie eyed the ladder mistrustfully.

"No," he replied. Sportacus blinked in confusion.

"No?… Why not?"

"I'm scared."

This was definitely odd. Robbie never admitted to being scared. It would be blaringly obvious if he was, but he never _said_ it. Maybe he really was sick? Sportacus frowned a little.

"Haven't we been through this before? Just climb down!"

"No!" Robbie replied. "You come and get me."

Sportacus bit back a frustrated noise and quickly ascended the ladder until he was eye-level with the stubborn man. He grabbed Robbie and jumped down, wincing slightly as Robbie squeaked in fright and clung a little too tightly. Sportacus set him on his feet.

"Better now?" he asked. Robbie brushed off his clothes shakily.

"Oh… um yes," he replied. He glanced to each side briefly, then straightened up and tried his best seductive look.

"So, ah… how can I _repay_ you?" he purred. Sportacus blinked, his face blank.

"Huh?"

"You know, for rescuing me."

"You… want to repay me for rescuing you?"

Robbie blushed, feeling stupid and awkward suddenly, but determined to push forward.

"Yes," he replied. He gathered up what was left of his nerve. "Because you're always saving me somehow or another, so I thought maybe I might… give you something in return." Sportacus smiled, slightly relieved. It was still out of character for Robbie, but the proposal sounded more like the things Stephanie tried to do for him as thanks for being such a good hero.

"You don't have to do anything Robbie!" he assured him.

"No no, I insist!" Robbie was adjusting a cuff on his wrist, avoiding eye contact with the blue elf. "So uh… how about it?" Sportacus scratched his head.

"If you really want to I guess," he replied reluctantly. "You really don't need to though."

"Perfect!" Robbie exclaimed, grinning. "Meet me in Lazy Park at seven?"

"Oh… sure!"

Robbie smiled one more time before racing off, disappearing rather quickly. Sportacus was almost convinced that the man had secret entrances scattered throughout town. He shook his head. What kind of thank you had to wait until after sundown? And what kind of thank you "gift" was he going to get from Robbie Rotten? A machine maybe… or something.

He pondered the possibilities while he went to go play some kickball with the kids.

* * *

Meanwhile, underground…

"How am I going to do this?" Robbie lamented, pacing back and forth across the cold floor. "Am I _ready_ to do this?" He paused and considered it. He had never tried this with a guy before. It couldn't be _too_ different, right? And the blue elf was shorter than him… he could just pretend, and get it over with.

He puffed out his chest confidently and took long strides across the room. Pretending was something he was _very_ good at.

He had this in the bag.

* * *

Sportacus hummed to himself happily and did some cartwheels in the grass while waiting. It was dark out, and all the kids had gone home already. Now he had to meet Robbie. He was still wondering what the tall dark man had in mind, and if there was one thing Sportacus was besides athletic, healthy, cheerful, and helpful, it was curious. He stood up as he saw Robbie's lean form trying to sneak in the darkness. He waved, and heard dimly Robbie mutter to himself. But Robbie came over and stood in front of Sportacus.

Sportacus regarded him curiously.

"You wanted to meet me?" he said after a moment. Robbie fidgeted and glanced away.

"Yeah," he finally replied. He glanced at the sports elf. "You have to close your eyes though."

Sportacus grinned. He was used to this game from when Stephanie prepared surprises for him.

"Okay!" he said cheerfully, and covered his eyes with one hand. He stood there for a moment, and was about to ask Robbie what the surprise was, but he suddenly couldn't.

Because there was a set of warm lips covering his own.

Just as the elf was relaxing minutely, past the point of really questioning what was going on, the warm pressure disappeared. Sportacus slowly removed his hand and opened his eyes.

Robbie was gone.

Sportacus felt heat rising to his face, though he didn't know why, exactly. His lips felt exposed against the cooling night air, which was odd. He had never really thought or focused much on his lips before. How strange.

He called down the ladder to his air ship and climbed into it. This was a little confusing. Maybe a good night's rest would make everything seem clearer.

* * *

Meanwhile, Robbie was trying to not hyperventilate. That was quite possibly the most terrifying thing he had ever done. He ducked into the entrance to his home, and settled in his chair. He curled up and shivered.

That didn't feel good. It didn't. Because if it did feel good, it would make everything fall apart. Every careful plan would crash and burn. He knew the consequences of it. If this plan backfired on him…

He felt a chill go up his spine, and he curled up further in the chair, hiding his face against his knees. If this plan failed… if it backfired and turned on him this time, it'd be the last time it would ever happen.

But he was in too deep to abandon it now.

* * *

AN:

This is the beginning of Robbie's plan blowing up. Sort of. He set it up to be rescued, so he could "repay" Sportacus with a kiss. It's all part of his plan, but _enjoying_ t wasn't part of that plan. So he's starting to get scared. Silly Robbie.

Sportacus has no damn clue what's going on with Robbie. He's also a little in shock from the kiss. It's his first, remember. And that bit about the kitten... Sporty loves kittens. He's a cat person.

Okay guys, seriously. 100 hits. 100! I'm gonna melt. I friggen love you guys.


	4. Carress

**Chapter 4: Carress**

Sportacus watched the kids playing from above. He closed his spyglass and smiled. It was always a nice thing to see the kids all together and being active. He glanced out over the town. The mayor was, for once, doing paperwork with help from Bessie. The kids were all playing, even Pixel. He spotted a small black shape cavorting in the grass of the park, and he knew it was the kitten. Then he looked at the billboard.

A strange clenching in his stomach worried him slightly, but he brushed it off. He thought a lot about what had happened the night before. He knew what kissing was about, mostly. He knew you did it with people you liked. On the cheek if you were just being affectionate, the forehead if protective, and the lips if you liked that person the most, more than anyone else. He knew the basic rules.

But Robbie had been acting strangely as of late. Agreeing to eat sports candy, playing with the kids… and then all the odd things he said, and the general strange behavior around Sportacus. He couldn't figure it out. One moment Robbie seemed to be begging for his attention, then the next shunned it. Was it a bizarre sort of plot? Like a feint while playing sports, where you imply one thing and do another?

Robbie Rotten was flirting, that much was certain. But Sportacus couldn't figure out _why_, and why all of a sudden. Truthfully, he only had a vague idea of what "flirting" consisted of. He knew adults did it. And he knew what it consisted of, that is, the actions that went along with it. But what was the purpose of flirting? What meaning did it have? At that moment, a small flash of realization came to him.

Flirting was a type of game.

Flirting was a game, and Robbie was _playing_. The sports elf's mind was racing in circles, and his heart beat faster with excitement. Robbie Rotten was playing a game! With him! It was a sign of good will perhaps, or maybe Robbie was finally tired of being lonely and sought to ease his way into games by sticking to an "adult" game, and seeking shelter with Sportacus, who he knew wasn't going to reject him for playing.

It made perfect sense.

Sportacus jumped up when he saw Robbie struggle out of his house and start sneaking into town as usual. The sports elf grinned broadly and dashed back into the interior of his ship.

* * *

Robbie snuck past the group of babbling noisy children on his way to the ice cream stand. He needed something other than cake today. All that worrying and thinking about what he had done the night before was leaving him with an even bigger sweet tooth. He desperately needed a distraction.

He sat down on a bench a minute later, licking the ice cream cone and looking at nothing in particular. He did like being outside, just not with all these noisy children running around. He took a small bite of the ice cream.

"Robbie!"

He yelped and jumped, dropping the ice cream cone. He turned to face the cheerful smiling blue elf.

"You made me drop my ice cream!" he snapped. He flinched, but it was too late. The words had spilled out before he could think better of it.

"I'll buy you a new one, okay?" Sportacus offered. Robbie looked at him suspiciously, but took the bait.

"One chocolate please!" the elf told the person in charge of the stand. Interestingly, said person took note that it was _Sportacus_ ordering ice cream, and made sure to take the scoops from a tub labeled "sugar free".

He handed the ice cream over to Sportacus while Robbie was distracted and trying to scoot away from the spilled and melting ice cream on the ground.

"One sugar free chocolate," he said. The sports elf's eyes widened slightly in surprise, but an instant later he smiled, thanked the server, and handed Robbie the ice cream.

"Here you go," he said. Robbie took it with a mumbled 'thanks', and licked it. Sportacus had to resist the urge to giggle. Robbie hadn't even noticed the lack of sugar.

"Can I sit here with you?" he asked after a moment. Robbie looked up at him with suspicious eyes. He wanted to ask 'I thought you were _incapable_ of sitting?', but he remembered he was supposed to be nice in order to win him over.

"Sure," he replied. Sportacus smiled and took a seat next to Robbie. A rather close seat, actually. Robbie had to focus on not squirming further away, and as a consequence his back went straight and he tensed up. Sportacus noticed and the smile slipped a little.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Y-yes," Robbie replied quickly. "Just fine."

"You're sure? You look tense."

The thought of using that line to his advantage and replying with "maybe you could help me feel better?" flashed across his mind, but he couldn't hold onto it.

"I'm fine," he said. Sportacus went silent for a moment.

"Maybe," he said finally. "I could help make you feel better?"

Robbie froze, tongue half out of his mouth to take another lick at the ice cream. It slowly slid back into his mouth.

"W-wha?…"

Sportacus abruptly flipped over the back of the bench and moved behind Robbie, placing hands on his shoulders. He felt the way Robbie tensed and clicked his tongue disapprovingly.

"How can you feel good if you're all tensed up like that?" he asked, and pressed his thumbs in a circle against Robbie's shoulder blades. The first thing he knew about this game was that it involved touching the other person. And if Robbie wanted to play, Sportacus wouldn't deny him. He continued the rubbing, feeling Robbie's muscles slowly relax.

Robbie was torn between panic, bliss, and a joyful triumphant feeling. If Sportacus was flirting, that meant he was interested, and that meant he was halfway there. Halfway to victory! And the rubbing did feel really good… but that was also terrifying.

Robbie absently continued licking the melting ice cream and allowed it. Just this once. He could push the uncertainty and uneasiness into the back of his mind for now. He let himself relax.

Sportacus smiled, happy with himself. He had never played this game before, so he was a little unsure of it, but it seemed like it was going well. What to do next?… He wracked his brain, trying to think of something. Ah. There was one.

He leaned closer, his head coming down to Robbie's level. He spoke softly into the man's ear.

"Feel better yet?"

Robbie's eyes nearly crossed. What was… Did the elf sound _seductive_ just then? A spike of apprehension went through him. It was all fine when he was the one doing the seducing. Because he was in control then.

This was unacceptable.

He swallowed what was left of his pride, and slipped into a different persona. His eyelids lowered slightly, a mild smirk played across his lips, and he tilted his head back to look at Sportacus.

"Yes," he purred. "How am I going to repay you _this_ time?" Sportacus fought a rising blush at the memory of Robbie's last "gift". He didn't know why the thought of it was doing weird things to his body. He struggled to think of a response, while Robbie was grinning smugly.

"You don't need to repay me," he answered finally. "Being able to make you feel good is enough." He felt a rush of excitement. He was playing with Robbie! He never would have thought. Even if this game was really odd, and new to him, it was still a game, and he was still managing to entice Robbie Rotten into playing. Maybe later they could play something else, like baseball? No, that required more people… was there any kind of sport that required just two people? Tennis maybe… He stopped thinking and his eyes got wider, a blush forming on his face.

Robbie didn't know what exactly had possessed him to lean back further and tilt his head just so, or to capture the elf's earlobe lightly between his teeth. Whatever had possessed him, it was pretty content at the moment, with the warmth radiating off of the sports elf soaking into his skin. Very content. He licked the captured flesh once, and sucked on it lightly before letting go. He sighed and straightened up again, taking another lick of the melting ice cream cone before it dripped everywhere and became messy. The difference in flavor and temperature made him shiver slightly.

Sportacus was busy trying to get his brain to work again. He swallowed hard and fidgeted, taking his hands off of Robbie's shoulders and climbing back over the bench. He sat rather still, looking at his hands. When he did finally look up, he saw Robbie gnawing on the ice cream-soaked waffle cone left over, a smudge of chocolate left in the corner of his mouth. Without thinking about it, he reached out and wiped it off, then licked the sticky treat off of his finger. He did like ice cream from time to time, and this was sugar free. Strawberry and vanilla tended to be his favorites, but chocolate was nice too… He looked back at Robbie and Robbie stared at him. The sports elf removed his finger from his mouth and thought quickly.

"Want to play a game?" he offered. Robbie blinked.

"What game?"

"Whatever game you want!"

Robbie continued staring, finally nodding once slightly after a minute.

"Any game I want?"

Sportacus nodded enthusiastically, wanting to forget the strange feeling from only moments before.

"Even if it's not a sport?"

Nod.

"Follow me."

Robbie stood up and started walking, and Sportacus followed. They were both trying to ignore the tension building.

* * *

Sportacus looked around in awe. Robbie lived here? In this big empty warehouse? He was too busy gazing around in awe to notice the terrified look on Robbie's face, before he carefully schooled it back to the mildly seductive look and mentally prepared himself. He turned to look at Sportacus, who was examining the ceiling, enthralled.

"Hey," he said. Sportacus blinked and looked at Robbie. Robbie felt guilt well up in his chest, but he viciously crammed it down. Any other time he could afford to be a softy. This… wasn't the right time.

And didn't he deserve a reward for all this hard work?

"About this game…"

"Yes?" Sportacus said, that damnable smile easily appearing on his face.

"Do you know what sex is?" There. It was out there. Sportacus tilted his head.

"No," he replied. "What is it?" Robbie swallowed and tried to calm the frantic beating of his heart.

"A game," he answered smoothly. He felt another painful twinge at the way the sports elf's face lit up. Not the time. Not right now. Deal with it _later_. Right now, this is the next step in the plot. And that's all it is. It was nowhere near as embarrassing as dressing in drag, at any rate.

"What kind of game?" Sportacus asked enthusiastically.

"It's… well…"

"Yeah?"

"Hold still and close your eyes. That's the first part."

Sportacus blushed a little and his eyes widened.

"Are… you going to kiss me again?"

Robbie nearly flinched, but kept it under control.

"Do you want me to?"

There was a pause, and Sportacus nodded slightly. Robbie slid back into his self-created role of seducer. Sportacus took a breath and closed his eyes, though he couldn't stop his fingers from twitching anxiously at his sides. Robbie moved forward, and tilted the elf's face upwards with one finger under his chin. He leaned down and pressed their lips together gently. A few moments passed, and Sportacus finally responded, hesitantly. Robbie deepened it gradually, leading him. The sports elf was awkward and unsure, but Robbie had to admit- he was a very quick study.

Robbie reached and slid his fingers underneath the edge of the hat, then slipped it off. The dislodged goggles fell to the floor with a clatter. By now, it was instinctual to press against each other and silently beg for more contact, more attention. Robbie broke the kiss slowly and contented himself with stroking the back of the sports elf's neck lightly. He drank in the sight of Sportacus with his eyes half opened, looking like a content cat in a sunny windowsill, being stroked leisurely. It was such a perfectly lazy image that Robbie found it almost addicting.

"Oh…" Sportacus finally murmured, feeling dazed and sensitive. "That feels good… I like this game…"

"I thought you might," Robbie added. He started walking backwards slowly, careful to not trip over anything, leading the still-dazed Sportacus along, and into the bedroom doorway.

* * *

AN:

I could end it here. But that would be completely out of my style, wouldn't it? Nowhere near enough angst. Don't worry. It's in the next chapter.

A little delayed in posting, but not too bad I think. Had to deal with the holidays and crap, right? Of course. I got loaded for Christmas. People can check my LJ for details. And also for me babbling about the new episodes of LT that I watched. Bwaha.

I like this chapter. A lot. Sportacus is so innocently naive, even while trying to seduce Robbie back he's still an innocent about it. And Robbie is dealing with everything the only way he knows how- retreating into a different personality. He does the same thing when playing with the kids. Poor guy doesn't know how to interact, doesn't know how to trust other people not to hurt him. He was a fear of not being in control, of being abandoned, and of being rejected. So, he's making damned sure he doesn't put himself in a position for it.

Of course, you can't make it work without opening yourself to wounds, but we've already established that Robbie goes about things in exactly the wrong way.

Poor Sportacus is just getting swept up in it without even suspecting a thing... well, you'll find out in the next chapter at any rate.

Happy Yuletide, you crazy people! X3


	5. Pinch

**Chapter 5: Pinch**

Sportacus didn't think he had ever blushed so much in his entire life. In the days afterward, he had resumed being the hero with no difficulty. But every time Robbie Rotten would emerge from his home, Sportacus felt like bounding over, an exuberant puppy, and smothering the man with affection.

He had, in a roundabout way, asked Stephanie if she knew what being in love felt like. She didn't, but tried to explain what she had heard about it, and he listened carefully. Over the course of these few days, he had come to the conclusion he'd been looking for.

He'd fallen in love with Robbie Rotten.

It was disconcerting at first, because it was so new. It wasn't in his nature to worry about things, but he found himself worrying about this. After… _that_… Robbie hadn't seemed to seek him out, and he didn't seek Robbie out either. They both probably needed to sort it out, Sportacus thought. But, now that he knew for certain, he knew he had to take the first step. He had to put himself out there, and hope for the best.

* * *

Robbie Rotten was having a somewhat less positive experience.

After what was admittedly the best sex of his life, even if it _was_ with a virgin, the feelings of guilt kept piling up. But more than that, he found himself sulking in his orange chair, trying to doze off into a nap, when he'd suddenly imagine muscular arms wrapped around him, and warm breath against his skin. He'd immediately startle awake and pace angrily, destroy a few things, rant, rave, and then repeat the process again. And again.

Everything he'd ever worked for. The only goal in his life had been to get Sportacus out of town. That was his _only_ reason for existing. Before the flipping blue elf came swooping into town, he had been useless. Content, but utterly useless and without a direction. He'd resigned himself to the fate of rotting away in this small town a long time ago. The pink girl posed no threat to him, though she had been amusing to mess with. But then she had to go and call Sportacus. And then Robbie had a goal, something to try for, and he tried his hardest, even though it was the total opposite of being lazy. It didn't matter, because he was secretly delighted to have this challenge.

But it would all fall apart if he was in love with the stupid elf. And he couldn't risk that.

"Robbie!"

He cringed and considered ducking behind a wall. But it was too late. The elf had spotted him.

Sportacus came jogging up, coming to a stop in front of the taller man and smiling nervously. "I wanted to talk to you."

Robbie felt his heart clench.

"Alright."

Sportacus glanced around, and once assured of their privacy, looked Robbie in the eyes. Robbie wanted to look away. But he couldn't bring himself to.

"Robbie," Sportacus started. "I've been thinking. And I thought a lot. But… even though it seems kind of odd to say…"

There was a tiny voice in Robbie's mind that was begging the sports elf to stop. Robbie's face remained impassive.

"I've never been in love with anyone before," Sportacus continued. "But…"

Please stop. Please.

"I love you."

Something clenched in his heart. His face grew blank. Sad.

"Is that so?…" he whispered. Sportacus nodded, and reached out hesitantly with one hand to touch Robbie. To get some kind of reassurance.

"Prove it."

Sportacus stopped.

"What?"

"Prove it to me."

"… How?"

"Leave," Robbie said simply, his voice flat. "Leave town."

Sportacus felt panic well up. His eyes got wide.

"W-what? Robbie?…"

"Are you deaf?" Robbie grated, his head lowered and staring at the ground. He could feel emotion clawing at the edges of his control. "Get out of town. That's how you'll prove it to me. That's your devotion. Nothing… nothing else."

Sportacus shuddered, looking at Robbie with disbelief. What started out as a game was something that wasn't fun anymore.

He took a step backwards. And then turned and ran.

Robbie shuddered and slowly continued on his way.

* * *

Sportacus climbed into his air ship, and the entrance sealed up, air tight. He felt something tearing at his heart and his eyes filled with tears. He stumbled forward and landed on his knees. He hadn't cried about anything in…

A sob tore through his throat and he wrapped his arms around himself, doubling over and resting his forehead on the floor.

Robbie wanted him to prove himself by doing the last thing he ever wanted to do. He wanted him to prove his love by doing the exact opposite of being close and loving him.

It was too much.

He screamed in misery and frustration, and didn't move from his position for an hour.

Robbie had no appetite. He sat in his orange chair and felt no comfort from its furry texture. He made cake, but it was left sitting out, untouched.

Hurt blue eyes kept flashing across his vision. He hid his face in his hands and shook.

It was all for the best.

Getting Sportacus out of town… now everyone would remember him. He'd be the winner in their little battle, and everyone would know it.

_"What kind of game?" Sportacus asked enthusiastically._

It had never been a game. Games didn't matter.

It wasn't a game, and there were no winners.

Robbie curled up in his chair and bawled, utterly alone and with only himself to blame for it.

* * *

Hours later, Sportacus had washed his face, and was looking out over Lazy Town one more time. Just once more. It was all he had planned. Nothing else.

But his crystal flashed, and he automatically dropped into the small town and raced to the rescue. He hadn't meant to.

He caught Stephanie as she was just about to take a nasty fall from on top of the playground equipment. He set her on her feet. She smiled up at him, relieved.

"Thanks Sportacus!"

"No problem Stephanie," he replied, though his voice was quieter than normal.

"Sportacus!" Ziggy cried out, and clung to his leg, tugging on the material there insistently. "Sportacus, you _have_ to help! Stingy won't share again! And Trixie hid all my candy!" Ziggy rambled for a good while, and Sportacus watched, his expression unchanging.

They needed him still. He couldn't leave, no matter what. He was being selfish. He couldn't leave.

But he could certainly make himself scarce.

He kneeled down and motioned them both closer.

"I need you both to listen very carefully," he whispered. They nodded. "I'm… playing a game with Robbie right now." He didn't let them ask why or how. "It's very important that he thinks I'm gone. That I'm not around anymore. Can you guys keep this secret for me?" They nodded again, looking confused, but they promised. Not a word, to anyone. He smiled a little sadly at them and retreated back into his air ship.

It would be lonely and boring. But he might have a chance. Just maybe.

* * *

AN:

Yes, Robbie is a villain. but you can't blame him that much. He's scared too.

I'm kind of worried I may have put Sportacus too out of character. It's hard to explain.

Ah, the next chapter is the last. What Sportacus plans to do is fairly simple, and you'll hear about it more then. Not much though. Like I said, it's simple.

This chapter title was a bitch to come up with. It came down to this and hickeys. Geh. Damn chapter titles.

I downloaded all of the Latibaer christmas CD. They have some hot songs on there. I find myself loving Icelandic more and more. XD If it was up to me I'd only ever listen to christmas songs in Icelandic. I can't understand more than four words, but it sounds oh-so delicious. Way better than German. And more fun than Japanese. And whoever sings on this CD is DAMN good. I mean like soul-melting good. Is it the accent? Is it just the timbre of his voice? I don't know. But it's _hawt_.


	6. Comfort

**Chapter 6: Comfort**

A week passed. And, Robbie thought, it was hell.

This was supposed to be his triumph. It was supposed to be his ultimate victory. And it was supposed to make him happy.

It did make him lazy however. He was becoming increasingly reluctant to leave his lair, even as the kids kept playing and making noise. He didn't care anymore. He sat in his chair and stared at the walls, unable to sleep.

It was ironic.

Eventually the hunger pangs in his stomach were too much. He exited his house, blinking in the bright sunlight that stung his eyes. Everything hurt. What little muscle mass he had previously was deteriorating, and it was more of a struggle than usual to lift the lid over the entrance.

He didn't even bother sneaking as he walked through the town. There wasn't a point.

"It's Robbie!"

Scratch that. There was a point. He just didn't care enough.

Trixie came running up, and pushed his legs, too short to shove him properly. She was glaring viciously up at him.

"What did you do with Sportacus, you jerk?!" she yelled. Robbie looked down at her, eyes blank. He didn't answer.

"_WHAT DID YOU DO_?!" she screamed, and gave his leg a solid kick. He grunted. It hurt, but he deserved it. There'd probably be a large bruise left. He still didn't answer. Trixie wailed in frustration and sorrow, attacking him with all she had until she wore herself out and Robbie started walking away with a limp. He headed back for his billboard. Ziggy and Stingy rushed over to Trixie and tried to calm her down.

He wasn't hungry anymore. He didn't care what his empty stomach was telling him.

Sportacus had to swallow back cries as he watched from behind a tree. He had seen Robbie for the first time in a week, and automatically hid, though he knew no one could see him anyway. It took a bit of magic, but it was the best solution. Invisibility was a useful thing, sometimes.

He grit his teeth and bared it while Trixie attacked Robbie ineffectually. He wanted to go out and help. But he couldn't.

As he continued watching, he saw Robbie walk away with a limp, and in that moment decided to follow him. Not because he missed him and wanted to see him again, he told himself. But because he was concerned.

He silently followed Robbie as he opened the secret entrance to his home and followed him in, sliding in just as the door closed. He watched as Robbie tried to lift the lid. It wouldn't budge. Was it his imagination, or did Robbie look smaller than usual? Sportacus tilted his head, analyzing. Robbie panted, managing to lift the lid only an inch before he had to drop it again. Robbie's face abruptly clouded over.

"_Damn it!_" he cried, allowing his legs to fail him, and slumping to the metal floor. He banged his forehead against the metal tube. Sportacus flinched, reaching out automatically to stop him, but remembered in time. He wasn't allowed. He watched helplessly while Robbie continued to abuse himself, and he shook with the effort it took to keep from breaking cover.

"I HATE THIS!" Robbie screamed, grabbing his head and seeming to curl in on himself. "I didn't mean to!" Everything that was ricocheting around in his head was pouring out of his mouth. He wanted to say it to that stupid girl. He wanted to apologize and he wanted Sportacus back. It wasn't the same without him. "DAMN IT, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!" he sobbed, and felt his body start shaking from the strain he was putting it through. He sobbed brokenly again. "S-Sportacus… come back…"

He yelped and flinched away when he felt a hand on his back, turning his head. His wide eyes got wider.

"Y-you…"

"I'm sorry," Sportacus said, smiling a little sadly. Robbie's eyes filled up with angry tears again.

"Why are _you_ sorry?" he hiccupped, still not anywhere near being stable. "You have nothing to be sorry about." Sportacus paused.

"… Did you miss me?" he asked finally. Robbie sobbed brokenly again and abruptly turned around and clung to him.

"Y-yes," he mewled. "Don't… don't leave again…"

Sportacus smiled slightly into the chest he was being pressed against.

"Okay," he conceded. He let Robbie cry it out.

"I'm sorry," Robbie sniffled. "I'm sorry." Sportacus didn't reply, but hugged him and closed his eyes. Robbie suddenly hit his back lightly with a fist.

"You weren't supposed to just _go_, stupid!" the taller man said. "You were supposed to say no and fight it!"

Sportacus laughed for the first time in a week.

"Sorry," he responded. "I wasn't thinking." Robbie huffed.

"I could _tell_. You never think anyway."

"I think about _you_," Sportacus added gently. Robbie fell silent, but gripped him a little tighter.

"I can't change," Robbie whispered after a minute. Sportacus nuzzled his neck affectionately.

"I know. I don't mind," he replied quietly. "Just try not to break my heart. I need that." Robbie laughed shortly.

"I didn't think your heart got broken," he said. Sportacus paused for a moment.

"It does," he confirmed. "It's as fragile as any part of me. But…" He pressed against Robbie further, cuddling up. "Even if it does get broken, I seem to recall that Lazy Town has a resident mad genius who's good at fixing things."

"Ha," Robbie snorted. "Everything I fix ends up _weird_."

"Nah," Sportacus replied, looking up at him. "I'm fairly sure you've told me I'm weird before. You can't make me any weirder."

He pulled Robbie down and kissed him gently.

"Besides," he breathed when they came apart. He looked back into Robbie's gray eyes. "Neither of us needs fixed, right?" Robbie blinked, then smiled slightly after a moment, relieved. He put his forehead against the sports elf's.

"Right."

* * *

AN:

The end!

I hope you guys liked it. I know it wasn't much of a resolution. But... I like it. It seemed right. Neither of them really has to change, in the end, but they still changed. It's hard to describe...

Like usual, working on a few other fics. Not all necessarily SportaRobbie (gasp!). I have a humor crossover/recasting with Labyrinth. Another smut-fic (Creamy is up on AFF, so you know), and an interesting angsty thing that involves drugs, gay sex, and naive Robbie being strapped to a bed by a worried Sportacus. Taking The Fall influences me too much and I know it. But that's okay.

Mm, as usual, you can check my LJ for updates, snippets of upcoming fics, etc.

Thank you for reading (you guys are really too nice, 500+ hits last time I checked) and please leave a review.


End file.
